My Top 5 Favourite Smash Bros Characters

This one was suggested by my boyfriend, so, if you hate this, you can blame him. Just kidding... ;)

Anyway - 

1. Kirby - There is NOTHING cuter than that little pink ball inhaling enemies to spit them off the screen. He's cute, sweet, and his taunt is just adorable. You know the one I mean, when he screams 'hi' and waves at the screen and you just want to pick him up and hug him forever. His face and his clapping at the end if you lose is just priceless. 

2. Toon Link - There's just something about this little guy - and it's adorable. Who doesn't like seeing this little guy running across the stage screaming and crying 'HAAAAAAAAA' whenever he just swings his sword at the enemy - and let's face it, the kid has style. Better if you could play the character with the lobster pyjamas though. 

3. Jigglypuff - I love this character purely because I don't know how to fight as them, so when all the other characters are fighting it out big style, i'm subconsciously rolling sideways along the stage until I accidentally fall off the edge. 

4. Ness - Because I can call him Nate to annoy Myles - which is hilarious because it really winds him up. 

5. R.O.B - His attacks may not be strong, but they are super cool and hes a good character overall, though i just use him to wind Myles up when he says the character is terrible. I disagree greatly.  

My Midnight Blog

Ah, nothing like a good cup of tea and a good book at the end of a long day. It's Friday everybody! Time to celebrate I assume! However if you are reading this on a good old Friday night you mustn't have a lot to do.

Just kidding, I'm glad you're joining me on this fine evening.

 Today has been a great day for me, for the first time in ages I could walk outside only wearing a hoodie over my bare arms and smile, not feeling cold and listening to the best and happiest music my phone has to offer me.

It brought a smile to my face knowing how perfectly things fixed themselves. This time last year I was at sixth form, a worry box, always self conscious and late to leave the house. Worrying if I had left my straighteners plugged in or something like that.

Now that I've moved on from that state, I can only remind myself of one time which made me realise how wrong everything had gotten.

I was standing in the line to get a carvery with my mum and a few others when she stopped and smiled at me. "you've got the colour back to your cheeks now you've left. You looked a little grey for a while."

I just couldn't picture it - yet it had been so obvious in front of the mirror whenever I looked at myself. I was shocked, it made me realise just how bad everything had gotten, how wrong I could be with the direction I was going towards. Getting way too stressed with my common worries and pile them up with trying to remember 50 gazillion names for an exam can really tire you out. I just wish I'd seen how bad I was.

Now that I have my feet firmly on the ground again I can certainly say that I am 100% better and I want to say thank you to the people who have supported me for who I am, those who do and those who will.

Yes, its cheesy.

But that's just me.

Reading

Its difficult to explain how I feel about books, and reading. When I open a book, I can be a little skeptical at first until I get warmed up towards the characters. Then when I begin to like them, everything becomes... Exciting. I spend my days reading sometimes, and if I'm not, I'll be wishing I was reading.
One of my favourite feelings in the world is reading, because when I'm reading, I get totally absorbed in the book. Before I know it, I'm transported to their world, reading it like it was my own diary entry from a memory long gone. I can picture all the characters perfectly in my head and I follow all their movements in the story like they're real life celebrities. I get excited about events that aren't even happening outside of this book and yet; when I read I'm not the person who I usually am.

When I'm reading, I am that person, I feel their emotions and picture everything in my head like it had really happened.

Something special happens to me when I'm reading. Something I don't quite understand, but it makes me who I am. It inspires me to do my own stuff. I've been writing ever since I was a little girl. I feel invisible when I read a book, oblivious to anyone who looks at me when I'm grinning sheepishly at the book I'm reading, trying not to squeal with delight if something good happens.

I hope people understand how I feel, how important a feeling it is to be whisked away from the real world, even if it is for just a little while.

Shyness

Okay, so a lot of people wouldn't think of me as quite a shy person, right? 

You are all wrong. 

I can hide it well, being, I know when I need to be confident and I know how to act to make myself believe that I am confident, but I need a little push. 

An example, I hate taking compliments sometimes, for example, if someone said I have a nice smile. It's terrifying to me. I like having them of course, who doesn't? But sometimes I fail to believe it. When they leave, however, it will leave me in a good mood and I'll find myself blushing and always smiling. 

I can be confident when I am talking to strangers, but... It's difficult to explain. Like, if someone is sat behind me or next to me on the bus I will be anxious for the entire journey. I'll keep my distance and always be looking out for an empty seat where I can move to. 

It's difficult to say because, although I'm really shy. I know how to act confident, which brings out a little more confidence in myself, but you know when I am anxious. It's too obvious. 

The most difficult part of all of the shyness though, is really wanting people to read the things that I write, but never having enough courage to think it's good enough. I wish I knew how to act at that point, because if someone is reading what I write, I am scared. 

My blog is a way to get all these feelings out. I mean, I'm really not shy to know anyone reads the things about my life, real thoughts and feelings. 

But I'm scared of someone knowing the different wonders that go on in my mind that I can't express unless they're on paper, and even then the words don't last long.  

How I came to Start My Own Blog

I've never been someone to always want to write a blog. In fact I just had the idea one day, I was looking up websites where you could publish your own stories, chapters at a time. After being unsuccessful, I decided I would begin a blog. 

But why would anyone want to listen to the words of an 18 year old girl?

I'll tell you why. 
Words are powerful things, just one sentence can make you rethink every little decision you ever made. One word can mean so much to you, make you think back to your childhood years, hiding from your friends, playing on the streets and running away from the imaginary dragons only you and your friends could see. 

When I write, I don't do it to grab attention from anyone, I do it because it's my passion. It's one of my favourite things to do. I'm always scared to let people who I know read what I write. This is why I don't personally share my blog on Facebook, or any social networks where many people know who I really am. 

I write this blog purely for people to know the different passions that I am unable to express in person. 

If you are a stranger to me, I am eager to get to know you, but I am incredibly shy. I try to make myself look outspoken and kind to others but inside I just want to run and hide, even though I always made new friends as a kid. The way that I am now is a mix of pacing myself to get to know someone, and being to anxious to let the real me out. It sucks, it really does. I find it difficult to describe my feelings to a stranger without going to deep into who I am, and understandably, if you are a stranger to me, I will be a little bit reluctant to do so. 

If you are my friend, a lot of the time, being as silly as I can be, I will laugh a lot or have deep convorsations, but I am constantly anxious to make sure that I don't bore anyone. Seriously, it can suck. 

Here on this blog, I hope to share some deep thoughts, and although you can't speak to me in person, it makes me feel a little bit better about sharing my thoughts. 

I hope you, as a person, are someone I can speak to with great confidence. This way I can share without being scared of someone's opinion. It's easy to see that you're boring someone in person, but with this blog, if I do bore you, it's easy to just press the 'x' button at the top of your browser. 

I hope this isn't the case, but if anything I say does speak out to anyone, however little the feeling may be, I would love to know about it. 

Until next time. 

My Top 5 hates about : Videogames

I thought I would try something new today, and I thought I would talk about my top 5 of different subjects, this blog is videogames.

1. Graphic tearing - when the graphics all seem to be so perfect, then suddenly you can see the inside of a wall, or under the floor. The worst is when they turn into glitches and you can make your character run through buildings to carry out your crazy shenanigans elsewhere that wasn't even on the map.

2. Glitches that stop you completing the game - there is nothing worse than one of the characters preventing you from completing a task because they aren't functioning correctly. Not only that, when things just go wrong in general, for example, your character gets stuck on an object... What do you mean you haven't saved for 2 hours?

3. Flashing screens - when games use flashing as their loading screens, not common, but still there.

4. When series are considered bad because of one game - Come on guys, give some of them a chance.

5. Unskippable cutscenes. - if you replay a game, you will know what I mean. Because nothings more irritating than having to watch a five minute cutscene for the 2nd time when all you want to do is get through the game.

This Darn Society

Today's blog, I'm hoping will encourage people to be themselves and hopefully be able to break from their binds that hold them down by the regular strains of modern day society. I will section it out into categories to justify each of my points. 

Beauty
Okay, so one thing that people do not understand so much is that everyone has beauty. It doesn't matter what anybody says to you. It doesn't matter what size you are or how shiny your hair is. So many people spend hours a day (both genders - this applies to males too!) trying to maintain these high standards that people expect when they go out. They spend hours curling their hair or putting it up. They cut their hair short and wear hair extensions. People need to remember that beauty is more than just skin deep, you need to be able to look in the mirror and smile at yourself, knowing that you, yourself are beautiful no matter whether you spend 10 minutes getting ready, or three hours. 

Interests
People do not have a say in your interests, never let anyone make you believe that what you are interested in is wrong, or you are not as 'cool' as them if you like what you do. People are allowed to like what they want to like. People who wear black all the time and listen to 'screamo' music are allowed to listen to Olly Murs if that is another thing that they like, nobody has the right to tell them that it's wrong. You like what you like, and if people try to change you, always stand up for yourself and prove that they are the ones that are wrong for trying to change you. 

Social Status
Let me get this final thing out of my system, it doesn't matter about your social status or who you hang out with. You're always amazing, whoever you are. 

The Wonders Of Being Happy For No Reason

Today has been a bit of an odd day for me. After my recent twitter rant yesterday about there being no good news at all and claiming that my image of humanity was being torn to shreds before my very eyes. I had no idea how I was supposed to have a good day if I had heard no good news.

Today I got up and went through my daily business with a smile, got ready and walked listening to my music, feeling just happy without a cause. It is an odd day where I didn't worry, I didn't care what people thought and I was confident of myself.

I laughed all day at so many things with my friend, making sure both of us had an enjoyable day and whenever I was asked what was so funny by her, I just said I didn't know, because I had no idea.

Its not every day I can get on the bus (which a lot of my twitter followers know I hate A LOT) with a smile tugging at my cheeks, listening to happy music and listening to a joke band, trying to keep my laughter in. Its Monday.

One of the best feelings I have experienced in my 18 years on this planet is feeling good for no apparent reason, sitting back with a coffee and smiling for no reason. Getting on through life whatever the weather.

Life has taught me that although there are bad people in the world, although your view of the world has been crushed between your fingertips, you can still be happy. Smile just to get though the day, and remember that you will always have a friend who loves you.


(See it's not all bad news!)

Irritating Habits

So, this afternoon (because I did my Valentine's Day blog yesterday) I want to talk a bit and humor each and every one of you about my annoying and extremely irritating habits. 

Habit number one is that I am stubborn. I will admit it now I am one stubborn girl. An example of this would be that, if stuck on a game level, I will continue to retry for hours on end, and would rather give up frustrated, than allow ANYONE else to do it for me. This is one of the worst habits I have because it annoys me so much that I begin to take it out on other people and mostly myself. 

Habit number two would be that I keep falling asleep while watching things on the TV and then being angry that I missed that episode and I have to go back, then I'd be annoyed that I don't have enough time to go back, then I would be very angry that I still have to get out of bed to brush my teeth rather than just going back to sleep. This is annoying. 

Habit number three, I wash my hands way too often, I always have antibacterial hand stuff - JUST IN CASE. I really don't want to pass anything on, no germs, no nothing. My right hand went really sore for a while because of all the washing of my hands because I was ill and I didn't want to pass anything on that I earned the nickname 'Granny Knuckles' from my boyfriend. It's getting better I'm pleased to say though. 

Habit number four, I over-think WAY too much, 100% too much. It happens too often and know that I am trying to solve this issue as it does give me some worries, but again, trying to sort it. I won't go into this one because I'll start a rant. 

Habit number five, my rants (ironically). If someone even mentions something that irritates me, I will not be impressed and I will continue into a huge rant about why it isn't right and why it should be solved. And I WILL go on until I have included every detail, even when I see the person probably isn't all that interested. 

Oh well though, right?   

Valentines Day

It's Valentines Day tomorrow. So this is my valentines day special. I want to share something dear to my heart.


The story I am about to tell you will be brief, but my point is, sometimes things aren't as they seem. I hope my story will give those confidence who feel they may need it.


I have been with my partner now, for 3 and a bit years, the time has gone so fast. When I was young, I didn't think myself to be desirable, good girlfriend material, too clingy. As I mentioned in a previous blog I said I felt a bit self conscious back then. Anyway, whenever I used to get a boyfriend, I was always so desperate to be around them, yet so nervous when they were there. I had butterflies so much when they looked at me, I ended up feeling sick or with pain in my stomach (I fell a bit too hard). HOWEVER. During a history class, I was speaking to a friend from the year above, we weren't close, but we were friends. He had another friend in the class who we ended up talking to. We ended up bonding over music tastes and ended up closer friends.


Its funny to think back to these days, I wasn't sure about him at first, and the funny part was my first thought when I saw him which was: "Wow he's hairy". (He was the only boy in that year with facial hair I don't mean body wise). This boy was sweet, kind, always looking for someone to speak to.


When we began to be 'us' it wasn't like anything else I had experienced. I wasn't nervous or worried. I still got Butterflies around him but I felt... Safe.


This was just a quick story of the beginning of my relationship with my dearest boyfriend. This was to remind people that first impressions don't change your opinion on the person themselves, love should never be based on just looks, they have to have some personality or there's no point. It is also to point out that people should feel relaxed with their partners, remember to smile and always be yourself.




*Side note - Sorry this has been such a short one guys, been out after today and only got back a half hour ago and I'm knackered. Will be a better one next time. Just know that if this doesn't make all the sense it could - I'm super tired.

Constantly At War With Inanimate Objects.

Okay, after careful consideration of the name of today's blog - a blog about how it's okay to be a little bit on the weird side, I thought I would share a reason I think I am a little bit weird. 

Yes. I do feel constantly at war with certain inanimate objects. Such as my bedroom door. My bedroom door is loud - sometimes I hate my bedroom door. Sometimes I physically shush it. It just makes me that little bit weirder. It doesn't affect me personally or mentally - I just want it to halt with the irritating squeak. I'm not the only person like this, I have known people to shout at objects when they hurt them. I would also be one of these people. 

Can I just make it clear that I do not talk to the objects like they are people, I just groan at them and occasionally shush them, while calling them a stupid name to make myself feel better. Sometimes the names don't make sense, ugh. I don't really know how to explain it. Some objects just anger me, when I know plainly it was my fault that whatever happened, happened and I have no reason to blame the object. But I do. Sounds ridiculous, I don't know. 

ANYWAY. This was meant to be a blog to tell people that it's not a bad thing to be a little bit different from anyone else, not to be scared to stand out from the crowd. Never be ashamed to be who you are, who you want to be. If you want to just blend into the background, that's fine. If you want to stand out, that's fine too. But never, EVER be afraid to be who you want to be, because that is a mistake you may just regret one day. 

Meeting Old Friends... and Enemies

When I was at school, I was always told to make the best of it, because 'your school days are the best days of your life'. They also told me that you learn who your real friends are when you leave school.


That last statement was true. Since high school, the place where I had about 20-30 friends who I spoke to every day, only about 5 people have stuck with me until now, only 2 who I speak to on a regular basis. Even my best friends from different years turned their backs and went their separate ways. They told me we would be friends forever. Now when we see each other I am just blanked. I don't particularly mind to be honest, but it shows that the statement above is true.


I'm not saying you shouldn't trust your friends, because there is a chance they will stick around, but all I'm saying is make sure, if you are in school or college or anywhere like that... Make the most of that, and your friends.


I know it sounds depressing, but I wanted to share this because I ran into an old friend today and they only speak to a few people from school too. I wanted to share this because I find it terrifying how fast everything changed. Your high school life will change a million and one times, but make the most of it.

Imagination

I think one of the most beautiful things in life is having a good imagination, being able to create something purely from an image in your head, a drawing, a piece of writing, a sculpture... Anything that will make that image come to life in front of your eyes.


Personally, I think so many people have amazing imaginations in this world, some are game developers, youtubers, artists and writers. You have an amazing imagination when you can plan an entire idea in your head, or mentally change the landscape around you to something completely different. I do this when I am listening to music (of course you still have to remain constantly checking the environment for dangers such as roads and things like that). When I am listening to rock songs I imagine the scenarios (not the music videos) and create my own scenarios where the song would be appropriate.


The mind and the imagination have no limit. This is what too many people forget, but they should know that if you do want to create, if you have your own image, go for it. Yes it might take you time, well, it could take you a year or more, but you can achieve. As a part of the human race I believe that we, each and every one of us, can achieve if we want it so much.

Raising Self Confidence

We live in a world, Ladies and Gents, where there are unfortunately a lot of people with low self confidence, and I feel your pain people. I have had a number of years I spent with quite low self confidence. I always did things to make others happy over myself (which isn't much of a bad thing) and I never really had the courage to stand up to many people. 

Over the last year, I have found that my confidence levels have been getting higher. In 2014, I left my sixth form year behind, which had my confidence levels sinking from being so worried about failing, and being someone who struggled badly with the subjects I had chosen. I spent a few weeks away from home at my grandma's house, where I was away from everything that could cause me stress, and my mum challenged me to a social networking challenge called '100 happy days'. This helped me a great deal, as although I didn't finish the challenge, it helped me to find something (even the smallest thing) that could make me smile through the day. Whether it was just seeing a family member I hadn't seen in a while, or eating a meal I really enjoyed. One of them I remember was just having a few hours to myself where I could just sit with a coffee and read, and not be bothered by anyone. Last year, also, I began to have the attitude of being able to not care what people think. This is a hard thing to begin thinking, and it was difficult at first. 

I accomplished this by speaking my mind, no matter how silly or embarrassing it was and trying not to concentrate on how people would react to it. I tried to think to myself 'what would it matter to me what other people thought of who I was?'. There were a few times where I had to mentally tell myself off for caring. This will not be easy for anyone, and a lot of people may care a lot about what people think of them. I'm not saying you shouldn't care, but if people don't like you or don't like something that you have said honestly, then why would it matter? Unless you have offended them or said something you really shouldn't have, then it shouldn't be a huge issue. 

I am working towards being able to look in the mirror now, and being able to smile and be happy with the way that I look. I want to be someone else, someone unique to the world, I want my cares to be miles away when I'm happy, I want to be friends with who I want, and like what I want. 

This, as I said before, won't be as easy for everyone. If you are struggling, there is NO HARM in asking for help and there is nothing to be embarrassed about. When your confidence begins to grow, you will know. 

This is just my personal story, to help to create more happy, beautiful and confident people in the world who are happy with who they are. There is always help for those who ask for it. Smile and live, everybody.